The truth about dogs and cows

I write this post because it is the first time that one of my twin daughters, makes ​​a joke. Without knowing it, without realizing it. But every time I think about it, I smile. She took my hand when she dropped the legendary sentence. And that’s why I write it down. Because for two and a half years and we have experienced many of their "first things".

We are in a small village called Santes Creus. Park the car. In front of us, a young couple crossing the street with a beautiful Dalmatian dog. Estel looks at me and says: "Look mama, a small cow."
I can not help smiling. I think it’s the best gag in the world. It's funny how five words of my little one can make draw a smile so big inside and make me happy just to remember the situation. This must be one of the many great rewards of being a mother.

Really happy!

This blog was created with the idea of ​​being a kind of notebook to remember this great adventure of being a mother of twins. But being a blogger can be addictive!. I am very happy to tell you that iMama.tv (an English page and community) has chosen me as one of its favourite bloggers. Therefore, with the invaluable help and complicity of the Maria Rosa Garrido with the translations, THE TWIN INVASION begins a new path.  Check the link! 

http://www.imama.tv/contributors-view-3-blogger-166-the-twin-invasion.html

The twin business (2)

When you await a baby you discover supermarket aisles that you have never noticed before. I’m sure you’ve also been through this. I haven’t got a pet, so I never stop by the pet food aisle. I remember the first time that I entered the baby aisle. I was five or six months pregnant and I started to look at the prices and available range of nappies, milk and baby food, because I felt that I should already know all these things by then. This is what a Master’s degree is badly needed on. I remember leaving the supermarket with a throbbing headache and wondering not only what on earth all those products were used for, but also why nobody had ever told me what they were used for and how to use them.

When you await a baby (and when it’s twins this grows exponentially)... it’s all Master’s Degrees. A Master’s on baby trolleys, a Master’s on cots, a Master’s on bottle warmers, a Master’s on breast pumps (a terrible device that should be banned and which we called Chucky the evil breast pump at home, and which we hardly used)... But here we could break away from the rules of the twin invasion which, as I told you, is based on the twin business. It’s a matter of putting a mother of twins in your life. Someone who already knows what you’re going through.

“My” mom of twins (whose position we might call twin-counsellor) has been the person who’s given us the most honest and practical advice during the pregnancy and ever since the girls were born. Meeting up with her was like looking into a crystal ball to see our future and know what we would experience in a few months’ time, in a year. Thanks to her advice and the many things that she passed on to us (material, clothes, small appliances... and especially helping us keep our feet on the ground and realise how we were targeted to sell us absolutely anything), the twins who want to rule the world did not obtain the expected income from us. Luckily, the idea of buying a nappy compactor, as well as many other  gadgets out in the market and on display in shop windows, never crossed our minds for a second. 
That’s why from that moment on, I have thought that it’d be a great idea if when you head for the GP practice, when you meet up with your midwife, there was a twin parent network to be able to share fears, everyday practices and everything which comes to your mind when you’re a first-time parent... and you’re expecting two babies at once. It would be a good idea if midwives took care of this. Let me refer here to the NeverEnding Story to say that mine- I mean, my assigned midwife- was a completely different story. We’ll have to come back to this on another occasion. 

The twin business (1)

 

In April 2008 we found ourselves at a kind of dead end. We wanted to move, but to relocate to Strasbourg. Or perhaps we would buy a camper and travel for two years. Or we would make up our minds to have a baby.

The truth is that we were not clear about all this. Even when we were joking (I don’t know why I say this, because it was not a joke), our friends’ daughter played the innocent hand to help us put all these ideas in order. We did it twice, and on both occasions, having kids ranked last on the list. And guess what… it was the first one to become true.

Faced with all these uncertainties, we used them as an excuse to tell our family that we were awaiting twins. We told them that we had been tied down, and in what a way! They all bought into it. The next step was to ask them if they wanted to see the documents for our mortgage and then show them the scan instead. “Can you see the little spot?”. And some replied “… but there are two of them!”. Yes, yes… two little spots. It’s twins. Our family went crazy with delight (I suppose that half of them took for granted- we took for granted, including myself- that kids were not for us). We could hardly imagine that our “joke” about the mortgage would be ab-so-lut-ely right in the future.

We soon found out that the twin invasion is based on the twin business. Double baby trolleys, cots, beds, car seats, hammocks and so on. Besides this, every single one of these operations also requires its corresponding Master’s Degree.

It is fascinating to find out how many useless objects are sold to expecting parents. I would like to think that having twins has been a reality check for us in many things and has made us realize that we have to play down many others.

"Love, you must be about to give birth, aren't you?". "No, I'm only five months pregnant"

In their efforts to rule the world, twins rely on invaluable help - or control-from governments, business people and scientists. But they basically have a grassroots network that carries out their job efficiently. They locate you when you're pregnant and it's in this period when they try to take their mission to the highest level. There isn't a prototypical profile, but I've noticed that they usually hide behind the appearance of 50 to 70 year-old ladies who identify you as a "twin bearer" right when they see you. And their main task is to scare the hell of you.  They start out by attacking your weak point... "Oh, love, you must be about to give birth, aren't you? With such a bump, right?". And you answer, with the best of your smiles: "No no, I'm only five months pregnant". And faced with everybody's puzzled expression when you answer this, you fall into their trap. You feel that you need to explain yourself: "I'm expecting twins". -You've messed up. The undercover agents tell you that they also had twins. And that when you're 8 or  9 months pregnant you won't even be able to move. But that the worst will come later on. And so on and so forth. 

I've got to admit that I had a good pregnancy (swollen arms and legs, low mobility after month six and some minor problems), but in spite of this I didn' feel ill. It's just that I had always been terrified of pregnancy and all these conversations didn't help much.

It turns out that a nine-month pregnancy allows for many anecdotes. Besides the undercover agents in the form of elderly ladies, they also presented themselves in the form of other pregnant women. They make comments about how they can feel their babies move. And you think: "I carry two of them and I can't feel a thing... I guess that I'll notice it when it happens, right?". Comments about having the baby room ready...and the whole family asking you who buys the little beds, the baby trolley or the hammocks. "I don't want to think about this yet". More things to worry about... you'd better take this, you should go for a walk after dinner (how on earth do you want me to go for a walk in the evening with this huge bump!), salty water baths are good for your swollen hands...

My big question is: What do twins expect from this clear attempt to scare prospective parents? What do they gain from it? Or are the undercover agents not part of the twin invasion but from another agency which tries to give us tools to protect ourselves? Are there other parents of twins who have come together to denounce the invasion?

When 'holiday' does not mean 'rest' any longer

24 hours and I will be on holiday. For several days I constantly hear: "You see, soon you will be on holidays, now get some rest". Who says that, has no children. Because now holidays are many new things, fun and exciting ... but there is no time to rest. With two children of two and a half years ... less.

We spent our first summer in the Pyrenees. One of the girls did not want to eat the vegetable porridge. Also we did not had too clear how to organize ourselves nor the time... it was a summer that could be described as disastrous. We were exhausted. The second summer was better. Following the timetable of the school everything worked on time. Now we are ready to start a new one. With the project of doing many more activities and have a great time with our little two ones… It will be fun, but I already know I will not have the time to rest. Every day I will have to think about the menus or I will miss nap times. Now I can not think of organizing those trips made ​​before being a mother. How I miss them! A few years ago, summer meant travel, languages, aircraft and meeting many people. I know they will come that back.

Like the first, second and next, this will be a different summer. Friday will be their last day at nursery school. A great story left behind… and new adventures to come. I am off, but will not forget the twin invasion updates.

Happy holidays, and especially ... take some rest! ;)

"You can sit down". "No thanks, I can see the screen well from here"

One of the most shocking moments in the whole twin process is right the moment when you are told that "you expect two". And they tell you as if it were the most natural thing in the world while you wonder whether you'll collapse or what the hell will happen to you next. In fact, I was frightened enough just to think that I was pregnant (I was terrified of pregnancy). To top it all, you always have a "fairy" friend  who jokingly asks you "Can imagine if it was twins?". "No, of course not! What on earth are you saying?".

Looking back in time, I can clearly remember myself lying down at the gynaecologist's office. That she asked my husband to come in...

-You may sit down.

-No, thanks, I can see the screen well from here- he answers-

-You'd better sit down.

-Well... is it going to take long?- he asks a bit stunned-

-Please have a seat, your wife is already lying down- she  says pretty annoyed-

Poor thing- the gynaecologist, I mean. She pictured him unconscious on the floor after pronouncing the word twins.  "Yes, you are pregnant, that is for sure... and can you see this?" (A question that I still consider absurd after the nine-month pregnancy just like I did during the whole process, because I've hardly ever seen or understood anything on a scan). "These are two bags.. it's twins. Well wait, let me check it again...". I've got to admit that I did stop breathing at this point. "Yes, there's ony two of them  ". If it had been three of them, then I might have fainted.                                                                                   
"Everything's going well so far". And that's all. Fifteen minutes after arriving to the office, we leave carrying  two scans in a bundle of nerves. I get together with the "fairy" friend and I break the news to her. And yes, I still remember her bursting into laughter. I go back to work... it is hard for me to focus. Me, who wasn't sure about having children... twins! In the middle of the afternoon I receive an SMS from my husband. How strange, I think. "How are you? I'm freaking out". I'm more freaking out than you are, I think.

I am one of those people who had never believed in those categorical phrases such as "my life totally changed the day that I started college... or got married.. or divorced". Until the 16th May 2008. The day when I learned that I was expecting twins.

And you? Tell us about your experience!